So I went to this very small (but awesome) craft fair – handmade items but I wouldn’t really call them “crafts” so…. anywhooooo… it’s out in a very small part of town (yes I know Houston isn’t SMALL but some areas are kinda remote and small -town-ish)… anywhooo
So my friend and I stroll up to the entrance and are standing in line waiting to pay admission when I spot none other than… ok let me give you some background… most of the people at this fair are not “into” fitness and probably don’t scour the internet reading articles and workout plans or claim an entire evening to themselves every time Oxygen magazine arrives in the mail so they can read every.single. page.
So we are standing there and I spot none other than JAMIE EASON! (if you don’t know, google and you’ll get a feel that she is probably THE most famous fitness figure/cover model in a general audience). She is also very sweet, soft spoken and genuinely kind
So this is what happened (in my ideal story):
So you know I calmly tell her I love reading her posts, think she is a wonderful inspiration for women our age, looks just as gorgeous in person as she does on the cover photos and did she have any in person advice for somone starting out… and then she said “awesome guns!”
What REALLY happened is so much more humbling (BUT ripe for a lesson which I’ll explain below – cuz you know we are always looking for lessons!)
BIG FAT HELL NO (sorry for the french but it is totally warranted!)
I totally run after her like a psycho, arms a-wavin, yelling “Jamie Jamie” (abandoning my friend at the admission gate) and mutter something about how I am a fan and can I take a picture cuz my friends are gonna die that I ran into her… threw my phone at a passing stranger to take the pic… and afterward she’s like ‘um what’s your name I didn’t catch it’… and calmly introduces herself to my friend. She even tried to make pleasant conversation, something about her fancy, new camera (duh I am a professional photographer, you think I could have thought of something to say about that)… but my brain was in spaz mode and I couldn’t comprehend any of this… You’ll notice as well that my picture is all fuzzy – that would be because the professional photographer with a crappy camera phone put her greasy little fingers all over the lens
By this time I was so mortified I just had to leave… and the FOUR other times I ran into her I ducked because I was so embarrassed about my behavior!
The part that REALLY pisses me off? almost no one else there knew who she was so no one was clamoring for her attention (or harassing her! or throwing camera phones in her face …) and had I been calm I could have totally had a nice long chat with her – can’t even comprehend what an opportunity was wasted!!!!!
I am not a spaz... I am probably the calmest person you’ll ever meet – to a fault really. I’ve heard the word “stoic” a time or 2 in my life. So this behavior really bothered me. I thought about it ALL evening.
- I tried to chalk it up to just being super excited to see someone who embodied a life changing event for me – something I’ve become passionate about and likely would react the same way meeting a famous photographer… na that wasn’t it.
- I thought maybe I just figured she gets bothered by fan attention ALL the time and I better say something and get my picture fast before I annoyed her…. na that wasn’t it.
- I finally come the conclusion that my extreme shyness and self-consciousness lurks not very far beneath the surface, something I THOUGHT I’d covered by at least one small dose of self-confidence and self-respect.
So what’s the lesson here? Well it’s a humbling one - and somewhat ironic after my story about my lasting committment to the theme STRONG (did you see I actually tattooed it to my body?!)… anyway it shows me there are still things to work on as a human being. Achievements and triumphs over struggles (like getting to my weight goal just as one example), do build self confidence and teach you to be proud of your achievements and confident in your abilities… still… they don’t fix everything… like the painfully shy issues and whatever lies at the base of those, like the passing up of some pretty great opportunities because you’d rather die than embarrass yourself. The internet has been a blessing for me – I know I don’t seem shy at all with the details and images I share especially on this blog… I wouldn’t be able to do that face to face
It means at 38 yrs old, after maintaining a 14 year marriage, raising 2 awesome children, tending to a 10 year career and then leaving that to own my own business I AM STILL LIKE AN 8 YR OLD GIRL in some ways and can’t even introduce myself calmly to another human being! hahaha
But at least I have the self-awareness to know that is something I should work on AND can see how it affects the doors and windows that will be open to me if I don’t
We all have something to work on – if you think you don’t, you are being too lazy (or scared) to look!
**What’s funny is that I have met several famous people as a part of my job – BUT they came into my studio and the focus was on their spouses or babies, not them… in this instance they are my guests AND I am acting as a professional so I never even thought about asking for an autograph or picture so maybe that made it different???**